I’ve been in a fog of late, unable to think properly or remember things or feel any motivation to do anything interesting. It’s been…it’s been a while. Then, the other day, Nicole handed me a B12 supplement with breakfast and…wow, what a difference.
I know that vitamins are, by and large, not especially effective, and it might just be a coincidence related to me not being sick anymore, but for the last three days, I’ve not only had energy, my brain has started working again. I spent something like 20 minutes last week trying to recall a violin line from a song that I’d played a zillion times and I couldn’t recall it and it just. drove. me. nuts. Sitting in the tub last night (yes, I take baths-baths are awesome), it all came back to me, as did a dozen other things I couldn’t remember.
It feels like rebirth, albeit on a fairly small and significantly less dramatic scale.
So, this is great. Now I feel like I can do stuff. I’ve missed doing stuff. Stuff can be a lot of fun.
As it turns out Final Fantasy XIV is pretty much an MMORPG. I knew that going in, but it’s done nothing but reinforce that impression. That’s not bad, but it means that it’s less “Final Fantasy” than I was craving. The storylines are getting better as I level up and I’m only level 46, so maybe the flavor will improve. I did come across a cutscene that hit me as hard as anything since Wrathgate:
The setup is that Alphinaud (the white haired boy) and Cid (the white haired man) are your buds, Gaius is the baddie (and Cid’s father figure somehow). Garuda, Ifrit, and Titan are…let’s call them demi-gods. You’ve just defeated Garuda in a fight, sort of, only not really. That’s the setup.
This felt genuinely horrific to me, like, stick-with-me-like-an-unsettling-nightmare kind of horrific. That’s what I play the game for. If there’s more like this? I’m in.
Speaking of things “I’m in”, I’m in a great mood right now. It’s sunny, I have energy, and I have Things To Look Forward To. Never underestimate the value of having Things To Look Forward To. When I was rock-bottom-y, I had to cling to little things, doctor’s appointments, payday, etc., as sort of the “next rung on the ladder” to keep me moving.
in celebration of feeling great, here’s a profoundly stupid song that will put a smile on your face until you get tired of it because it does sort of get old, but…well, you be the judge:
OK, I have a little work to do (I’m on call tonight!), but I didn’t want to let this good mood get away without putting something here.
Cheers,
RK