Hey, you! You like spoilers? Good! Read on! If not, then scram! I’m literally going to spoil the entire show starting with the next paragraph, so if you don’t want to know what happened, get outta here!
Alrighty, welcome to fight night 3 of season 5! The first two shows were heavy on brutal action and light on judges decisions. That’s not the case the time. Will it be “Duck was robbed” redux? You’ll just have to read on and find out.
Fight 1: Copperhead v. Gigabyte
Zach Goff’s Copperhead is probably the closest thing the fans will get to seeing Minotaur this year. It’s a 2-wheel drum spinner that hits hard enough to, well, we’ll get to that. John Mladenik’s Gigabyte is the Mother of All Full Body Spinners, a big, inverted wok with lots of bits mounted on the sides to smack you with. The only prediction I made for this one was that it wasn’t going to the judges.
It didn’t go to the judges.
Copperhead looks much the same, but the motor is definitely more impressive even if it doesn’t make the hornet-swarm buzz of Minotaur. The two bots spun up quickly and met in the middle of the arena. The self-righting bar on Gigabyte popped off almost immediately, apparently affecting their driving and allowing Copperhead to back them into a corner. A full-body spinner does not want to be backed into a corner.
The next few seconds were marked primarily by Gigabyte bouncing off the sides of the arena. Copperhead had some time to spin up and hit Gigabyte hard enough to remote the shell from the body. My guess is that the self-righting bar was probably structurally important because that really shouldn’t have happened. The Copperhead folks were nice enough not to clobber Gigabytes exposed innards ad the judge counted the decapitated bot out.
Winner: Copperhead (Knockout)
Fight 2: SubZero v. JackPot
Logan Davis is at the helm of Team SubZero this year. It’s a flipper that is best known for being able to take absurd amounts of damage as opposed to dealing it out. JackPot, driven by Jeff Waters, is a four wheel vertical spinner with two unusually large bars making it a sort of mini-HUGE. Interesting.
The bots came out and met head on, with SubZero getting under JackPot and driving it around the arena. It seemed like a good time to use that flipper, but it never fired for some reason. JackPot was struggling to move in any meaningful way and couldn’t do a lot with the weapon except when it was riding on top of SubZero and whacking the top of the bot.
It would have been interesting to see this one go three minutes to see how the judges would have called it, as SubZero was in complete control of the match but the primary weapon wasn’t work (note: this is foreshadowing). Eventually, SubZero’s motor gave out or it got hung up on an obstacle (it was hard to tell which) and it just stopped moving, giving JackPot the win in its first fight.
Winner: JackPot (Knockout)
Fight 3: Gemini v. Uppercut
Oh, Gemini. Ace Shelander’s multi-bot, a pair of 125 lb. bar spinners, looks good on paper but it’s had serious problems in the arena. Alex Hattori’s Uppercut debuted last year and had a shockingly good run for a new bot. It’s an unusual vertical spinner, with a single “fist” and a counterweight, so there’s only one “side” to the weapon and, of course, it hits up instead of down.
There’s no way I can make this recap a longer one. Gemini split to try to flank Uppercut, but Uppercut just went after the left bot and punted it twenty feet across the arena and over the wall. It turned, faced the other bot, and split it in two with one hit. Game over. After the match, Chris Rose asked Hattori about the fight and he just grinned and said “My bot is fun.” Yeah, it sure is.
Winner: Uppercut (Knockout)
Fight 4: Rotator v. BETA
Victor Soto’s Rotator is a contender for the Giant Nut. It’s a well-armored bot that can mount weapons on either end and Victor is a fantastic driver, as he showed when he dismantled Tombstone last year. This is the first time we’ve seen John Reid’s BETA in a while. It’s the apex hammer bot, really hard to hurt, and it can actually cause a little damage with the hammer (which, for a hammer bot, is really impressive).
The bots came out of the gate quickly and BETA just started pushing Rotator around. BETA had a huge armored wedge on it and Rotator couldn’t do a thing about. BETA just drove around shoving Rotator into the wall over and over. On the other hand, Rotator had a top-mounted disc spinner and the idea was that if the hammer hit it, the hammer would take more damage than their bot. The BETA folks agreed, and never fired the weapon.
So, it was essentially a wedge bot pushing around a spinner that couldn’t do anything about it. Eventually, BETA shoved Rotator into a corner and the the spinner bot bounced off the wall and into BETA’s hammer, knocking the head of the hammer off. That was literally the only big “hit” of the fight and BETA immediately resumed shoving Rotator around.
This one went to the judges and it was…not a popular decision. The judges split 2-1 in favor of BETA. I won’t get too deeply into Battlebots lore here, but, in order to discourage wedge bots, the scoring rules are heavily weighted in favor of bots that use their primary weapon. You can get 5 points for doing damage with your weapon, 3 points for aggression (and aggression with the weapon is favored), and 3 points for control of the match.
Was this the correct decision? I think so, but it was tight. The only damage that was done was one hit by Rotator when it was bouncing around and on one wheel, and the rules state that the only damage that counts is damage inflicted by “…deliberate, controlled action,” and it would be a real stretch to say that was the case. On the other hand, BETA absolutely dominated the other two categories. Rotator might as well have been immobile for how easily BETA pushed it around. This wasn’t DUCK v. Bombshell part 2: Bombshell landed some massive hits with its weapon.
The result also passes the eyeball test: Watching that fight, there was only one bot in it. Team Rotator reacted to their one hit like that hit would guarantee a judges decision and a lot of people agreed with that take. Is getting knocked around for three minutes but getting in one hit enough to win the fight? Should it be enough to win the fight? I don’t know. But, to my eyes, the better bot won.
This video will probably be taken down, but it’s a good watch if you can still see it.
Winner: BETA (Split decision)
Fight 5: Tantrum v. Valkyrie
I was rooting for both of these bots. Aren Hill’s Tantrum has made huge strides from the days when it was a cute, but utterly ineffective flipper bot. The “punch spinner” idea, where they launch a spinning drum into the opponent, is really interesting and I hope they continue to refine it. Leanne Cushing’s Valkyrie looks like it should be a top-ten bot: It’s a low, horizontal spinner that can hit really hard, and the low, armored body is tough to damage. It just hasn’t been as reliable as it need to be up to this point.
This one turned out to be a pretty good fight. Valkyrie was well on top early on, getting in several blows with their 65 lb. disc. But, as is often the case for this bot, the spinner stopped working and Tantrum went on the attack. Every now and again, the little puncher bot was able to get under Valkyrie and sparks flew. Actually, there were a lot of sparks in this match, even if there weren’t too many big hits.
Valkyrie was dazed and it looked as though Tantrum might take the W, but the drive stopped working and an it wouldn’t move anymore. I’m glad to see Valkyrie get off to a good start, but sad to see Tantrum take the loss when they were this close to a win.
Winner: Valkyrie (Knockout)
Fight 6: Big Dill v. Atom #94
Two rookies facing off in this one !mmanuel Carrillo’s Big Dill, which just invites all kinds of terrible puns and Kenny Rose tried to use them all, is a lifter with unusually long forks. Atom #94 (Plutonium, for those of you who don’t want to look it up), captained by Yash Deshmukh, is a vertical disc spinner of the Hypershock/Witch Doctor body type, so it looked like it could do some damage.
Unfortunately Atom #94 struggled with movement right out of the box. It just sort of wiggled around without any speed or direction, which is catnip to a lifter bot. Big Dill was able to pick the exact spot to make contact and just started carrying Atom #94 around the arena like a cat that was presenting a captured bird to its owner.
Big Dill wasn’t able to get Atom #94 out of the arena, and eventually, the forks got caught in the other bot’s weapon belt and the fight had to be stopped and sent to the judges. This was an easy one for them.
Winner: Big Dill (Unanimous decision)
Fight 7: Hypershock v. Gruff
What a fantastic matchup for the headliner, although I did comment to Nicole that the matchup was kind of unfavorable for both bots. Will Bales’ Hypershock is one of the fastest, most powerful, and best-driven bots in the tournament although it has had serious trouble finishing fights. Sam McAmis’ Gruff is the polar opposite: It may be the most rugged, reliable bot out there, but as a lifter (albeit a lifter with a scary torch, too), it’s not the biggest offensive threat.
It turns out the immovable object has the advantage over the unstoppable force, or at least it did last night. Hypershock dashed out of the box and tried to find somewhere to hit Gruff that wasn’t armored, but, failing that, just smacked it a couple of times. Gruff was able to function primarily as a ram, but it did manage to lift Hypershock and turn on the heaters and after that? Hypershock was cooked.
Winner: Gruff (Knockout)
For me, the quality of the fights wasn’t quite as high as it had been over the first two episodes, but we got a lot of drama, and that was certainly interesting. With a lot of rookie bots this year, you’re always going to get a mixed bag. Any time there’s a new bot, my thought is that the best you can hope for is that it will work. Not win, not even compete, but just do the things it’s supposed to do: move, attack, dodge, etc. If you can do that, you’re doing it right.
That’s it for episode 3. It occurs to me that the bot I’m not interested in seeing, Chomp, hasn’t fought yet. Surely next week, right?