Worlds can contain worlds, which, in turn, can contain worlds, and so on. It may not be an easy thing to wrap one’s head around, but it is true nonetheless. So it was with the world known as Orinda. The world in which Orinda resided was a cruel, indifferent one. Orinda’s world, which we will just call “the world,” separated Orinda from her sisters and brothers and beset her with maladies. She was alone and without friends when she became aware of six points of light, six potential new worlds, within her.
This is the story of those lights.
PART I
At their inception, the lights were faint and frail, as is often the case when a new world is conceived. The six were so small and indistinct that their combined light amounted to the faintest of glows. Their glow was precarious and weak, but all six of the lights were persistent and each proved strong because their world, Orinda, was imperilled. In time, they grew bright enough to be seen individually. Still without form, they took names: Wilder, Knickerbocker, Glorietta, Alice, Tilden, and Wagner.
In the world of Orinda, the six of them grew and flourished. They began to speak among themselves in the way that new worlds do. Wilder, the oldest, spoke the least, but the others listened when he did. Knickerbocker was the dreamer, who imagined a future for the six of them. Glorietta didn’t dream, but she planned and considered things from all angles. Alice was the explorer, and she knew the most about the world of Orinda.
Tilden and Wagner were brothers. All six of them were siblings, but Tilden and Wagner were inseparable and, while the two were the weakest of the lights, their combined glow rivalled that of Wilder.
One day, in the dark and warm world, the six heard a seventh voice. At first they thought it was the world itself speaking to them, but Alice assured them that this was not Orinda’s voice. She asked the voice its name and it said it had none. They decided to call this new voice “Chabot” as it seemed to fit.
Chabot was almost like one of them, and they grew to love and trust Chabot. So, when Chabot told them that he had terrible news, they all gathered to listen. Chabot said that there was something different about the world. Orinda was struggling and weak, and, in order to save the world and themselves, they would need to find a way out of the world.
The six were silent. Alice nodded as if to confirm that the world seemed to be changing. Knickerbocker’s eyes were distant and sad, but he nodded as well. Tilden and Wagner held each other, and Glorietta’s mind was racing. Finally, after a long silence, Wagner spoke.
“Then we must leave.”
PART II
When Wagner spoke, they all felt a shared certainty that he was right. For the sake of Orinda, they would have to find a way out.
“I knew it would come to this…someday,” said Knickerbocker. “Chabot, do you know how we can do this? We’ve never left the world before and we could use a guide.”
“I don’t know,” said Chabot, “and I’m sorry. I will accompany you for as long as I can, but I cannot go where you’re going.”
“How do we even go,” asked Tilden. “We’ve never been anywhere but here.”
Without missing a beat, Glorietta spoke up. “I have been thinking about this, and I think I know how we can do it. We must all take shapes that will allow us to travel. We will need to have legs to walk, eyes to see, ears to hear…”
“And hearts to dream,” said Knickerbocker. “I don’t think we will get very far otherwise.”
Wagner stretched and stretched and stretch until he had four legs and ears and eyes. He had a heart as well, but he kept it deep inside where no one else could see. He was well pleased with himself until he slipped and fell.
“Perhaps,” Tilden said with concern in his voice, “something to help us keep a grip would be good. Claws?”
“Yes! And a coat to keep us warm,” said Annie. “I have found cold places and breezy places when I was exploring.”
They all tried to stretch into shapes like Wagner’s, but with claws and furry coats, and they decided that these would be excellent travelling shapes. They practised standing and sitting running and jumping and found that balance was a problem, so Tilden suggested a tail might help. And it did.
Once they all became comfortable in their new shape, Chabot spoke up. “The world is aware of your moving around. She is ready for you to start your journey. Are you ready?”
The former points of light, which now resembled kittens, were silent. Even if they were ready, which way should they go?
At long last, Wil asked “Annie, you know the area better than any of us. Have you found anything that seemed like an exit?”
Annie thought for a moment and said “I have. There is a cave. It is small and very narrow, but it feels different from the rest of the world. I am certain that it leads somewhere else.”
Wilder smiled. “I am certain as well. Perhaps whiskers on our faces would help us navigate in tight spaces?”
Everyone agreed, even Chabot, who had no shape, and they agreed that they were now equipped for a journey. Annie, as always took the first step and her brothers and sisters followed.
PART III
The six of them lined up, Annie at the front, then Glorietta, Knickerbocker, Tilden, Wagner, and Wilder. Even in the tight confines of the cave, Tilden and Wagner travelled side by side. This was in part because they were the smallest of the group, and in part because they would have it no other way.
At the first turn in the cave, Knickerbocker said “This is the right way. If I close my eyes and try to pay attention, it feels as though Orinda is urging us along this path.”
Chabot, who remained with them, agreed. “This is a very difficult time for the world. She is very sick and scared, but also, she is warm for the first time in many ages. It is very important that we keep moving.”
There weren’t many forks in the path, but Annie played the role of pathfinder to perfection. She guided her siblings unerringly further down the tunnel. It was difficult going, as the tunnel itself seemed to twist as if it was in pain. One wall closed in on Wagner. Tilden threw himself between his brother and the wall, taking the brunt of the blow himself.
Wilder stayed at the back, sometimes helping Tilden and Wagner when they stumbled, and sometimes looking behind them. He didn’t like what he saw. The world was closing off behind them. Their journey would be a one-way trip and if they encountered any difficulties, they would have no choice but to continue forward. He noticed that Tilden winced every time he took a step, and he was concerned but said nothing.
Time had little meaning for the worlds who were kittens who were moving inside a larger world. Nonetheless, they could tell that their journey was a slow one and Knickerbocker was concerned that it was taking too long.
“I feel that the world expected us to have completed our journey by now,” he said.
“I think you’re right,” said Chabot, their voice starting to grow more distant. “Orinda is trying to help you, but she’s weak. It will be up to you to be both swift and strong for your sake and for hers.”
“Then we will be both,” said Glorietta. “We six are prepared for whatever tries to bar our way!”
As if waiting for such a pronouncement, Annie found the way forward blocked. It was a horrible slime, larger than any of them, and it was alive. They didn’t know what it was, but they could tell by how it was lurching towards them to block their way that it had no intention of letting them pass.
Annie leapt forward only to be thrown back immediately. She tried again, and again, with the same result each time. The slime slowly, slowly edged towards them and there was no room to retreat. The way behind was closed!
Wagner was terrified as the slime slowly began to grasp around his ankles, trying to surround him. He pushed with all his might, but no amount of pushing made any difference. Out of nothing but instinct, Tilden jumped to his brother’s defence and tore the slime from around Wagner, forcing it back.
“Ah!” said Wilder. “The claws! They do more than help us keep our grip! Brothers and sisters, you know what to do!”
And they did know what to do. All six of them sprang forward and, with their sharpened claws at the ends of their paws, they tore through the slime and soon had cleared the way forward. They were all tired, especially Tileden and Wagner, but they were encouraged by their success.
After a brief rest, Annie asked “Chabot, do you know how much farther we have to go?”
There was no reply.
In fact, they recalled that it had been some while since they had heard Chabot’s voice.
“He did say that he could not go where we were going,” said Glorietta. “That must mean we are close to the end.”
That was exactly what it meant.
PART IV
The going was easier now, though Tilden was now visibly struggling to keep up. Wagner helped as much as he could, and Wilder helped both of them when the pair couldn’t maintain the pace. The path was widening and it seemed as though Orinda’s encouragement was both gentler and more insistent.
After a good long while, they came to a gap in the path. Beyond the gap was something they’d never seen before. It looked like light, but not like the lights they had once been. It looked like another world. But to get to it, they would have to cross the gap.
Glorietta looked concerned. “We will have to leap. These forms of ours are well-made for jumping…”
“But you don’t know if we can jump that far?” asked Knickerbocker.
Glorietta shook her head. “I just don’t know.”
“We must, so we will,” said Annie. She demonstrated this by leaping across the gap, bouncing off the wall, and leaping all the way back.
“Wow,” said Wagner, although they were all thinking it. Annie was quite the leaper.
“Of course, we have no way of knowing what waits on the other side,” said Glorietta. “I hadn’t planned for this.”
“No, but how could you have?” asked Wilder. “I will go first. Annie, I trust you do decide the best course of action based on what you see when I go.”
Wilder looked at the five very worried faces and said, “We can do this, I believe in all of you,” as he turned and sprung across the gap and into…nothing. They all watched and waited, but there were no sounds and no signs of Wilder.
“He made it,” said Knickerbocker. “This is it. This is the goal of our journey, and he made it. I can’t leave him alone!” Knickerbocker leapt across the gap, not as fast or as high as Wilder, but he crossed it and was gone.
Annie looked cross and thought for a moment. “Glorietta, I need you to go next. Those two need you to ensure they don’t do anything foolish.” Glorietta smiled, turned, jumped, and was gone.
Next, Annie turned to see Tilden and Wagner clutching each other. They looked scared. Annie did her best to sound comforting and said “Wagner, I think you should go next. It’s your turn to join them.”
Wagner shook his head and “I’m not going anywhere without my brother.” As he said this, the world shook and the walls behind them started to close, just as Wilder had seen earlier.
Annie frowned. “We do not have time for this, and this is something you must do by yourself.”
Tilden looked miserable. “Annie, please go. Let us work this out. We will do what we have to do.”
Annie tried to protest, but the fierce look on her smallest siblings’ faces persuaded her that they would not accept anything but her leaving. So, she turned, looked over her shoulder one last time, and disappeared.
“Brother,” said Tilden, “I need for you to go next.”
“I will wait until you’ve gone ahead, ” said Wagner.
“We both know that can’t happen. I am tired, and I am weak, and I have been hurt many times on our journey,” said Tilden in a voice that was weak but full of certainty. “I cannot make this leap.”
“No!” cried Wagner. “You must! I cannot go without you!”
“Wagner. Brother. You must go without me. I would have given up long ago if not for you. Please, for me, do this. I would be very sad to have made this journey only for you to miss out on a new world because of me.”
Wagner sobbed and sobbed. He wanted to convince Tilden that he was wrong, but he knew his brother was telling the truth.
“Please, let me lie down and go to sleep, happy in the knowledge that my brother made the journey and is safe in a new world. Do this for me.”
So Wagner did. Even though he too was weak and he was very sad, he found the strength to make the leap and saw the new world for the first time. Tilden smiled, lay down, and fell asleep, and for the first time in as long as he could remember, there was no pain.
EPILOGUE
The five kittens, their eyes blinded by the light of this new world, met their mother Orinda for the first time even though they had always known her and she them. Orinda was in a shelter for the first time in her life, surrounded by strange smells and sounds, trying to deliver her children. It had been rough, but the worst of it was over for her. After nine hours of labor, she was spent but her work was done and she could relax.
Wilder did his best to shepherd his siblings towards their mother, but Alice, as always, kept wandering off on her own to find out what this thing tasted like, what that one felt like, and how the third thing smelled. Glorietta made lists of all the things that she was going to do when she wasn’t hungry, but for now, she was always hungry.
In fact, they were all hungry all of the time except for Wagner. Wagner showed little interest in food, or in exploring, or in playing with the other kittens. Knickerbocker noticed this and went to him.
“Wagner, can I help you in any way?”
“I miss my brother,” said Wagner weakly.
Knickerbocker was also his brother, but he knew what Wagner meant. He didn’t say anything; he just put a paw over the kitten’s shoulder. Wagner was shivering.
“I miss him so badly. It’s all I can think of, him being alone in the dark. I just want to hear his voice again.”
Knickerbocker thought for a moment and said, “I think I know how you can do that.”
Wagner raised his eyes with the smallest flicker of hope. “How?”
“You can speak with him again in dreams.”
Wagner brightened slightly. Knickerbocker knew a lot about dreams.
The very-slightly-older sibling continued: “I believe, if you close your eyes, and are very still, and very quiet, Tilden may return to you.”
And so, Wagner stood up, circled around three times and lay back down where he had been, and closed his eyes. He smiled, lay down, and fell asleep, and for the first time in as long as he could remember, there was no pain.
And in his dream, he saw a familiar ball of fur chasing after another who he’d never seen before but who was also very familiar. Tilden turned his head and said “Brother! I’ve missed you! Thank you for finding me where we can always be together!”
END
This is my attempt to process the highs and lows of watching a difficult situation at one of my favorite cat rescue centers, TinyKittens. I don’t know how long this video feed will be active, but if you’re interested, it’s quite beautiful and at times very, very sad: